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Narrowboat IronMaster's dockThe ramblings of a river hippy
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May 26 Crick n hell!I've been looking forward to this weekend all year. It is of course, the Crick narrowboat show, my yearly jaunt to see all the new boats and to buy myself lots of new loud gear for the summer (and every other season too for that matter).
We left yesterday, planning to have a few hours in the show before overnighting at the travel-lodge then a full day at the show today. We thought the weather last year was a tad on the grim side, but this weekend has shown us that this simply was not the case. By the time we got there yesterday, it was bucketing down.. and I do mean bucketing. It would have dryer standing under a waterfall!, so we decided not to go in (£9 to spend an hour or two in the marquees didn't strike us as good value). However, this morning, it seems like it would have been a really shrewd move.
We got to the show at 10am and headed in.. by 10.40, they announced that the show was being closed due to a severe strom warning. I managed to get 1 t-shirt.. and not my usual rainbow colours.. its kind of a muddy greeny brown (nice admittedly, but subdued for me).. and erm.. a refund on our entrance money.
Talk about disappointed. I look forwards to Crick all year. It's kind of the highlight of my boating year.. and this has been a majour disappointment of industrial catering sized proportions. I have a chance to get some more gear at Strawberry Fair in Cambs in a few weeks time.. but .. no Crick!
It's like someone tokk me out to a posh restraunt, let me peek through the window and then sent me home with no supper! A whole year with no pimped out wardrobe??? how will I survive!
*peace to all* May 05 Too much beer make Narra..Ughh.. me sit feeling brain all hurty. Me suspect large amounts of bittery wet stuff may have something to do with this... and small glasses of peaty wet stuff too. Arghh.. room going round n round again.. me stop and have ground up beans in hot wet stuff and make head stop hurty so much.
MMM.. hot wet.. ACK! Oops.. me got wrong beans.. wanted brown hard ones, not soft heinzy ones.. not right in hot wet stuff is that!
Okay.. on second attempt, head not so hurty.. or maybe it is, but can no longer feel pain.. 2 secs.. me check. *sticks pencil in ear* Nope.. me still feel pain, so head not hurty so much... but now hearing not work on left.
Ahh.. nice hot brown wet stuff good.. think brain is beginning to work again.. slightly.
It's been a bit of a weekend. Normally, I get a nice quiet time, all to myself.. but for some reason, this weekend has been like campbells condensed chaos. I ventured down the pub on friday.. for a couple of hours.. but it's amazing what you can pack in to a couple of hours. Pottered around on saturday.. and then Claire came over in the afternoon for a coffee and a chat. Then on sunday, Simon dropped over.. his Mrs was away seeing her family and had taken little sam with her. Hence me and Si doing huge burgers and multi pints down the pub. The intention was for him to stop and head back today, but due to his mrs having to come back early.. he had to bugger off sharp and tidy up all the cans and fag butts from the house before sh got home.. unless of course she's reading this.. in which case, he popped back sharp to make a nice meal and run a hot bath for her getting in.
I stopped down the pub.. which was as busy as hell, so of course me being mr useful, ended up clearing glasses, running the glasswash and bussing plates back in to the kitchen.. all of which I did very well given the 10 (pffff.. who am i kidding, more like 15) pints I'd downed.
Had some mates over V early today.. and after a quick wash n brush up, we... drank and drank and drank and drank.. and drank.. mmm there's a bit of a pattern forming here. I think we must have stopped drinking at some point.. but I'm lost as to how Im now sat typing.. when did THAT happen?
Tomorrow morning I'm expecting Brian down.. first time I've seen him in almost a year now, so it'll be nice to catch up. Then in the afternoon, Jenna might be popping over for a coffee and a chat.. and Simon has threatened to pop back over late afternoon (with a spare 15" lcd monitor).. which may involve more beer.. oh dear lord.
I'm kinda looking forwards to spending all wednesday in bed.. except that I have to pick up me pension, go into godmanchester for another interview, do my shopping.. arghh.. then Thursday, it's the usual me and Claire doing lunch.. but in town this time rather than the marina.. by heavens.. I'm already wishing it was next weekend.. i could do with some down time hehehe.
Peace n love all
Mick April 24 Victory is mine.. !!What a day.. what a day!
I had a meeting/ interview this afternoon with a really nice chap from the group that the psychologist put me in touch with about helping me. We discussed what I want in terms of help getting back to work.. discussed training and allsorts. The upshot is.. and I can barely believe this.. I have permission to return to college to get my IT skills up to date.
As of tomorrow, I'm going to start looking into courses and start making applications. I also have a contact to call to arrange some voluntary work to get me off the boat one or two days a week.. probably something connected with IT (I hope), but I'll look at all the options and take it from there. After I have handled that for a month ofr two, we may look at getting me a supervised placement with some company to actually do some proper work. On top of this.. I've gotten the smoking down to 5 a day (from around 40 a day last week).. and intend to be stopped totaly within a week. Next on the list is getting my pushbike repaired and running so I can do a little excercise every day and shed some of the extra poundage I'm carrying. Now.. as if this wasn't enough.. I've also had a couple of contacts via the online you-know-what.. and I'm chatting to a couple of really nice women.. not sure where any of it is going, it's kind of early days for that yet.. but it's a positive sign.
Could it be that my life is finally starting to come together at long last?
Funny.. just a few weeks ago, I was slagging the psychologist off as .. well.. read back. Right now, I'm really convinced that the guy WAS a genius. His comments fired the anger.. which in turn spurred me to bloody well show him.. which has led to me standing on my own two feet for the first time in god knows how long.. and I'm loving it.
I feel genuinely positive about myself for the first time in 14 long years.. like I used to do when I was working and doing well.. before all the crap fell on me. I feel like I could conquer the world. I feel GOOD.. and for the first time in an age.. I actually feel happy. I'd forgotten what happy felt like.. it feels warm and fuzzy and comfortable and right.
I haven't lost my objectivity.. I know it's early days. I need to navigate the failures and disappointments that are sure to come along during this process.. but I feel strong enough and confident enough in myself to cope with them and overcome them without collapsing into the black hole I usually do. Could these be the first steps on the road to a better life? You'd better believe it baby.. I DO!
Peace and joy to you all..
Mick April 22 7 more days..The final countdown has begun.. the little timer in my brain has clicked from weeks to days (more like hours) in anticipation of the release of the latest installment of the gretest games title ever made because on tuesday of next week GTA IV hits the shelves on X360 and PS3.. and I can't wait!
Hugely politically incorrect in every way possible, designed from the outset to wind up the conservatives of the world and those who's sensibillites are easily offended, GTA is one of those landmark, legendary games that non-gamers in society wil never, ever understand the attraction of. It's been banned in several countries over the years, villified by most organs of the press and cited as a tool of the devil by the moral majority.. and i LOVE it!
From car-jacking to mugging, assault with a deadly weapon to mass murder with rockets and flamethrowers and driving whilst pursued by the amounts of cops that home secretaries would have wet dreams about, GTA has it all. See a car you fancy? Steal it (maybe even pop a few caps in the original owner for good measure) and tear down the pavement at 140 mph, sideswiping pedestrians as you go and racking up your wanted level until even the national guard is on your ass with tanks.
It's just a glorious romp of total and utter chaos and bad behaviour.
I've been playing the series since the very first instalment that gave you bonus points for mowing down whole lines of elvis impersonators and I've loved every single second of it.
The last instalment, GTA San Andreas, has to rank as my least favourite of the titles so far though. For whatever reason, I just couldn't engage with it the way I had with Vice City and GTA3. I suspect the whole 80's gangbanging culture from San Fansisco/ L.A. that left me cold.. but now the series has returned to Liberty City and once again has the underdog fighting his way back to the top.. and the anticipation that this will be a defining moment in the series is enormous.
Yeah.. I know.. I'm 43 and still drooling over a game that lets my dark side run wild. What can I say.. BRING IT ON hahahaha.
The attraction has always been that it allows your imagination to run riot and find that your ideas have already been pre-empted and built in to the game. A true sandbox, where the designers go out of their way to anticipate the weird things that gamers will try to do that weren't part of the plan.. and GTA is the one that lets you go for it. No other game offers the freedom to go crazy that GTA does. Every time you pick up the latest instalment, you find yourself finding odd little moments that put a smile on your face and wondering "How the hell did they (the designers) know that I'd try and do THAT!".. like finding you could make a tank fly in GTA 3, by gunning it at top speed, turning the gun backwards and repeatedly firing it to get thrust and eventually airbourne.. or ending up with a line of 30 odd wh*res following your car down the street because you beeped your horn when passing them (ahh.. the legendary wh*re train hehe.. good times indeed.. my personal best was 27).
So.. be warned.. in 7 days time, I may vanish off the face of the planet completely for about 2 weeks.. incommunicado to the world.. while the boat resounds to gunfire, wheel screeching and copious amounts of laughter.
Tick.. tick.. tick..
Is it next Tuesday yet??
=Peace= Mick April 18 I may have lost my marbles..(Have you seen them by any chance? They we're in a string bag.. loads of glassies, a couple of decent steelies and 2 clays - one like a cat's eye).
But seriously folks.. I'm starting to suspect I may be going sane!! How on earth could this have happened??
I've gotten kind of sick, waiting for help that never arrives (damned quacks!) and of course, a lot of introspective thinking later, coupled with a bit of a whiskey session.. and I drunkenly arrived at the decision, I'm going to bloody well do it for myself! It feels similar to that moment that I first stopped taking the anti-depressants all those years back.. kind of "Bugger the crutch, I've got to learn to do this bare-brained and standing on my own two feet no matter what happens.
Soooo.. I've arrived at the decision that I'm going to get permission (notice the "GET" and not "TRY and get") to go back to college short term and part time to get what pitiful IT skills I have left up to date.. and the intention is to be working for myself, doing some freelancing web site construction, pc repair, some artwork and painting comissions and possibly fleshed out with some work in the pub kitchen, by my birthday later this year and I refuse to let anything official stand in my way. If they won't help me, Fine! But g*ds help them if they try and stand in my way, because the juggernaut is moving and ain't gonna be stopped by any red tape - I'll roll right over the top of the whole b*st*rd lot of them and pick the bits out of the wheels later on (possibly turning the chunks into some kind of grizzly red and purple motifed collage).
WHAT was I thinking??? I'm so far outside of my comfort zone right now, it scares me! I've had a ton of sleepless nights since this decision.. waking up in a cold sweat, scared that it'll go horribly wrong.. but you know what the scariest thing is? It hasn't put me off making the attempt or changing the decision.
I feel like I've got one more chance.. one last throw of the dice and I've got to stake everything on this. And if the damned quacks won't help or support me in this, then to hell with the lot of them. I'll bloody well do it on my own and bugger the fallout. Let's be honest.. if it works then great! I can turn around to the whole damned useless lot of them and tell them exactly what I think of them and their mumbo-jumbo heartless profit driven profession. And of course if it fails (which I have to admit, there is always some chance it mayl..) then they can pick up what's left of my sanity and my carcass and deal with it.. because I fear if it goes wrong again, that'll pretty much be the end of me, my confidence and my ability to function.
Damn.. I can't remember having felt like this for so long, it's not true. Motivated.. energised.. positive. It's full speed ahead number 1 and damn the torpedoes!
I'm starting to worry though.. this injection of courage and confidence may already have had unforseen results. I went and did something.. impetuous! I went and joined a *mutter mutter mumble*.. an *mutter mutter mutter*.. OKAY.. a dating agency. Jeez.. I swear I'll never touch another drop! (quickly hides glass of whiskey in hand). Fortunately I've had zero response so far.. Looks like nobody wants a 40 odd year old short haired hippy who's not currently working (well DUH!)
Before you even ask.. NO, I'm not going to tell you which site it is.. Baring my heart and soul in the hopes of finding someone gullible.. erm.. caring enough to want me is tough enough without some of you going and finding my profile and winding me up.. (you know who you are :p).
Ahh.. yah never know, I might get there yet. At least I can say to myself I'm giving it my best shot.
Peace and love to all
Mick
= Made in China? No Thanks! = April 08 The 'Beast' is unwell..Arghh.. only a few months old and already the poor old 'Beast' is suffering (The 'beast' in question being my new PC for those that aren't regulars).
I have no idea why, but she has developed a rather nasty tendency to refuse to boot up, claiming a cmos checksum error on boot, requiring me to alter the bios settings every time. My suspicions are pointing towards a nasty error to do with the soundcard conflicting with the onboard sound on the motherboard as it seems to be the onboard sound simply refuses to stay disabled in the bios. Why this shhould be the case is causing much head scratching (I'm wearing a flaming groove up there and the bald spot is growing exponentially), but I have a funny feeling it's to do with the motherboard instalation disk insisting that it needs to install drivers for the onboard sound.. even tho with it disabled, the system should simply not see it.
The plan is to strip the beast back to components and re-build it, this time manually installing each set of drivers rather than letting the installer have it's wicked way. If this fails, I may take a screwdriver to the mobo and pry the onboard sound off of it.. or maybe not hehe.
Congratulations are due to Paris for succeeding where London failed. Well done to the boys over the channel for putting the flame of shame out. Way to support Tibet guys.. big grats! Now lets keep this rolling.. snuff that flame at every opportunity!
Other news.. I managed to catch another Zuleika gig on saturday, this time at the Boathouse in Cambridge. Very appreciative audience this time and a cracking set. I'm contemplating suggesting some changes to the website, seeing as the band have now adopted a formal band logo. Might have a go at creating a new theme to fit in keeping.. but have to run this one past the crew first, so we'll see.
Other other news.. work on my own site for IronMaster has ground to a halt due to several other projects rearing up.. some of which are giving me ideas about going back to college and getting my 1337 work skillz well and truly up to date. Gotta go begging permission first, but I'm in touch with a group that may be able to help in that respect.
Other other other news.. ermmm.. bah! I seem to have run out of things to report. Think I'd better get myself out and do some interesting things.
Peace to all
Narra - "Made in China? No thanks!"
**Breaking News.. I just broke my computer chair. All the screws in the legs just snapped and the top fell off!! Wahhh.. my Cap'ns chair was my favourite seat too**
Guess I'll have to go round the antique shops and find me a 'new' one :( April 06 The Flame of Shame..I've been spending the day watching the coverage on BBC news 24 of the progress of the Flame of Shame (the Olympic torch) throughout the day, wishing I was there and making my voice heard along with those superb souls who have fought to bring the whole issue of Tibet and China's treatment of it's people into the sharp focus of the media attention.
I'm not going to re-hash the events of the day.. I'm sure there will be plenty of coverage on all the news channels (outside of China of course.. I doubt somehow that anyone inside China will get to see or hear the truth about the protests). What has incensced me all day is the stream of crap coming out of the mouths of those who somehow feel that these protests should have been muted.. or not even happened.. and that there should be no controversy over China's hosting of the games.
The worst nonsense these naieve (at best.. plain dumb at worst) fools have trotted out is that the "spirit of the Olympics" should not be interfered with by politics.
Hold on.. think about this for a second.. Lets just take a quick glance at the 'Spirit' in the words of the IOC's own charter shall we?
Fundamental Principles of Olympism
“Safeguarding the dignity of the individual is a fundamental requirement of the Olympics.” IOC Code of ethics So, what we should be talking about here is Fairness, equality, respect for others, non-discrimination.. hmm.. that being the case, just how the hell could the IOC justify ever letting the barbaric, totalitarian regime in China ever get to host the games in the first place. Maybe the decision has more to do with the REAL spirit of the modern Olympics.. backhanders, corruption and performance enhancing drugs seem to be the order of the day now. I understand that for athletes, the Olympics represent the pinnacle of a career in most cases, but lets be honest.. surely moral principles and ethics are more important than a medal metaphorically covered in the blood of innocents? The nonsense spoken today that taking part in the progress of the flame does not condone what China is doing.. I'm sorry.. How nonsensical is THAT statement. By taking part, you ARE giving your support.. the only way NOT to give support to China's behaviour is to refuse to participate. Let's face it.. China is not looking at the Olympics as some magnanimous display of philanthropism. Hell NO.. this is about MONEY! This is about selling the world a PR image of how china would like to pretend it is, whilst fobidding anyone journalistic access who might say otherwise. This is about sucking tons of foreign cash in to China.. Bless his Holiness, The Dali Lama.. true to own principles, he has spoken out against the obvious boycott, preferring instead to try and engage the Chinese authorities in dialouge as a way of moving forwards. Nice idea, but it's difficult to engage in talks whilst one party is beating the other over the head with a stick. China needs to be sent a message by the rest of the world that it's no longer acceptable to behave this way.. and the only method that will let them know in no uncertain terms is to stay away from the games and stop buying made in China products. Hit them in the wallet and they'll sharp figure they have to change. I guess I have a long way to go before I can become as spiritually enlightened as his Holiness.. Going to keep on trying though.
Peace and blessings to all.. a round of applause for those who stood up to be counted today, no matter what the consequences.. and to those that took part in today's processional travesty of "the Spirit of the Olympics".. Shame on you for giving tacit support.. you should hang your heads and pray to be forgiven by all those being persecuted in Tibet and China. Narra - "Made in China? No thanks!"
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Some of the other sites I keep an eye on
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